Bob Dylan

This is called Talkin' John Birch Blues
And there ain't nothing wrong with this song

Well, I was feelin' sad and kind o' blue,
I didn't know what I was gonna do,
The Communists wus comin' around,
They wus in the air,
They wus on the ground.
They wus all over. . .

So I run down most hurriedly
And joined the John Birch Society,
Got me a secret membership card
And went back home to the yard.
Started looking on the side walk,
under the hedges

Well, I got up in the morning
Looked under my bed
I was looking every place
For them goddarn Reds
Looked behind the sink
And under the floor
Looked into the glove compartment of my car
Couldn't find any

Looked behind the clothes, behind the chair
Looking for them Reds everywhere
Looked up my chimney hole,
Even deep down inside my toilet bowl.
They got away!

I heard some footsteps by the front porch door
So I grabbed my shotgun from the floor
Snuck around the house with a huff and a hiss
Saying 'Hands up you communists!'
It was a male man!
He punched me out.

Well, I wus sittin' home alone an' started to sweat,
I figured they wus in my T.V. set.
I peeked behind the picture frame,
Got a shock from my feet that hit my brain.
Them Reds did it!
Hootenanny television!

Well, I quit my job so I could work alone,
Got a magnifying glass like Sherlock Holmes.
Followed some clues from my detective bag
And discovered ... red stripes on the American flag!
Betsy Ross . . .

Now Eisenhower, he's a Russian spy,
Lincoln and Jefferson and that Roosevelt guy.
To my knowledge there's just one man
That's really an' truely an American: that's George Lincoln Rockwell.
I know for a fact he hates Commies cus he picketed the movie Exodus.

Well, I fin'ly started thinkin' straight
When I run outa things to investigate.
Couldn't imagine nothin' else,
And I'm home investigatin' myself!
Hope I don't find out too much . . . good God!